Are Borderlines more Passionate?

By Tami Green


Warning: I am going to deal with adult subject matter here.

So, are they?

The answer is yes. Absolutely. Positively. Yes.

And also...it's a sweeping generalization that may not apply to every person.

But don't you just love this question? I love it, because it makes me feel like I am part of a secret society of passionate love making geniuses that have secret knowledge that few others possess. And that just may be true.

There are many factors that play into why Borderlines may be more passionate.
First of all, those of us with BPD have an uncanny ability to hyper-focus on the needs of our partners. We can, at times, get into the experience of others in such a deep way, that it seems almost spiritual the level of understanding we can demonstrate. In return, the gratitude and responsiveness of our partners is deeply satisfying.

Secondly, we feel all emotions deeper, and they last longer than others experience them. When I feel love, I feel love much stronger than the average Jane has ever felt love. It sweeps over, under, around and through me in a way few ever get to experience.

. . .being physically connected to someone helps us feel defined. . .

Third, we act often on the impulse connected to any emotion we feel. And when we feel love, or lust, so powerfully, we may act on it intensely, without regard to thoughts of social norms or "shoulds".

Fourth, being physically connected to someone helps us feel defined in a way we long for, and a way we may not ever feel satisfied by in any other area of life. So, like a magnet, we may be drawn to passionate encounters in hopes of meeting not just pleasure, but a true, deep need within ourselves.

Lastly, we are very practiced at fully and completely throwing ourselves into "feeling" experiences. The world can go away as we press into the powerful, positive feelings associated with these encounters.

So, yes, we are more passionate, generally speaking. And yes, I do belong to a secret society of extra-ordinary people. Lucky me.

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